#ElderWisdom | Stories from the Green Bench

Dr. Bob Bell - Expert on healthcare for an aging population and prolific author of fiction

Episode #43 - Author of medical-based thriller fiction, an expert on healthcare for an aging population, and former deputy minister of health in long-term care in Ontario, Dr. Bob Bell shares his Story from the Green Bench with Erin Davis and Doug Robinson.
During his years at McGill University, Bob crossed paths with our episode #29 guest, Dr. Rea Brown through sports and medical school.  Stumbled into medicine after a knee injury playing football as a linebacker at McGill- this injury got him interested in bones.
Bob's hero is Terry Fox, who suffered osteogenic sarcoma. Terry’s example inspired Bob to pursue a career in orthopedic oncology (bone cancer). Fun Fact: Terry & Bob share the same birthday July 28.
Get involved in your local Terry Fox Run and programs: https://terryfox.org/
Author of medical based thriller fiction
1. Hip: A NovelAbout the benefits and risks of medical innovations, when a brilliant but unscrupulous scientist uncovers a breakthrough in hip replacement by coating it in a special substance. 
2. New Doc in Maple RidgeThe doctor is injured and returns to America from Afghanistan and has to start over. He chooses Maple Ridge Arkansas, to start a practice.
All proceeds from these books support medical research at University Health Network and at Princess Margaret hospital.    Books are available at https://drbobbell.com/
Our aging population is increasing (over 75 years old) by 4% and higher annually as baby boomers reach their golden years.  How will we care for them, how will we afford it, and will that crowd out other spending?
"Schlegel Villages, where the most up to date standards in long-term care and retirement living are observed." - Dr. Bob Bell
"We can be proud of the way our health system responded to the pandemic." - Dr. Bob Bell
What is your hope for the future of healthcare in Canada?
"Where have you seen a fax machine except in a doctors office in the past 10 years?" - Dr. Bob Bell
 
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Virginia Barry on swimming, canoeing, and being a lifetime member of Beta Sigma Phi

Episode #42 - Deep diving into some fascinating waters with Virginia Barry to talk about sorority and sisterhood, the importance of safety on the water, and her competitive spirit.  From The Village of Wentworth Heights in Hamilton, our first debutante on the green bench and a life-long member of a worldwide sorority, Beta Sigma Phi.
Joining Beta Sigma Phi at the age of 18 in 1952, she loves the sisterhood where she learned about formal table settings, formal greetings, banquets, volunteering and more. Her Toronto Chapter (Beta Omicron) worked with Sick Kids Hospital. She used to go for weekend retreats with her sorority sisters. She named the annual ball, The Yellow Rose Ball. A yellow rose is special, it is what you gift someone who is special in your life.
A Debutante is an upper-class young woman making her first appearance in fashionable society.  Learning dances such as the Waltz, Foxtrot, Quick Step and more prior to attended the ball at the Royal York in Toronto.  She is very proud.
A swimming champVirginia retired in 1991 from work, and decided to take up swimming at the local pool. There she saw a man who was always swimming lengths, Virginia decided that she would keep up with him. She was counting on this stranger to keep her going… it worked! In 1997, while in Florida she joined a swim team called the Silver Streaks. They were competitive and she ended up at the Huntsman Senior Games – it is like the Olympics for Seniors. There were 4,000 participants and she won a gold and six bronze medals. 
"Competition in swimming, badminton, tennis, volleyball and canoeing was for my own enjoyment." - Virginia Barry
"The best kind of sport is when you are competing against yourself for your personal best." -Erin Davis
Basic Canoe Skills can be found at Paddle Canada, a community of trusted leaders whose aim is to connect Canadians to nature through canoeing, kayaking and stand-up paddle boarding with certified Paddle Canada instructors. https://www.paddlecanada.com/
Virginia gave her father's canoe to the museum, it is on display in Gravenhurst.
On the Red Current River in Missouri, she was tossed out of the canoe in the rapids. The near-death experience did not stop her from getting in a canoe again.
"I've had a lot of wise seniors in my life, and it continues. How blessed I am." - Erin Davis
 
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Hildegarde Bolter on resilience in life, leaving her husband, and being a German child in the war

Episode #41 - Hilda lives at The Village of Wentworth Heights in Hamilton, originally from Germany, joining to share her story from the green bench with Erin Davis & Doug Robinson.  Stories of growing up during World War II, moving to Canada, having a son, leaving a challenging marriage, writing a memoir, and her resilience in all aspects of life.
"We were 6 years old. They told us that the gas masks looked like Mickey Mouse so we wouldn't be scared." - Doug Robinson
At 10 years old, she was strafed by machine-gun fire from a low-flying airplane. She locked eyes with the pilot who was laughing. She was rescued when two women ran out and pulled her to safety. It was an English airplane, and she was a child. 
"They forced us to go into the Hitler youth, otherwise you wouldn't have any future. They pushed us in the direction they wanted us to go under Hitler." - Hilda Bolter
"I saw the danger in which my mother was in to giving the Jewish people food stamps. I took the stamps from my mother and was helping to give them." -Hilda Bolter
Hilda is writing her memoir, it is in German, it’s for her son and her granddaughter.  "It is so powerful to what I went through and I want to tell my son that whatever it is, with the lord's help, you will conquer everything. You don't have to be afraid." -Hilda Bolter
"I wave to them and say hi.  How happy they are and it costs nothing." - Hilda Bolter
“You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it” – Margaret Thatcher
When you can help someone, it makes the world better
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June Campbell on Newfoundland joining Canada, 2 marriages and lots of traveling

Episode #40 - June Campbell is a resident at The Village of Riverside Glen in Guelph, shares with Erin Davis & Doug Robinson on the green bench.  She has lived a life that has not only witnessed history as it happened but in which she even rubbed elbows with Gordon Pinsent with whom she went to school.  June was born in St. John's, Newfoundland before it was even a part of Canada, learn more by listening to her story from the green bench.
June lived a proud moment in Canadian history and remembers when the premier, Joseph Smallwood, signed the documents on March 31st, 1949 when Newfoundlanders to become Canadians.
"Joseph Smallwood did not want any jokes about April fools, so he had the papers signed on the 31st. And then we all became naturalized citizens."
"We had our own currency, our own stamps, and paid duty from everything we ordered from Canada, even from the Sears catalogue." - June Campbell
In her first marriage of 22 years, she experienced a challenge with religious differences and her parents not accepting the mixed marriage between Catholic and Protestant.  "I got used to it after a while"
June went to a girls school which was very strict, having to walk in a crocodile line when walking past the boys school, and not allowed to look.
"The boys school was Bishop Field, the girls was Bishop Spencer, and never the train should meet." - June Campbell
Come From Away - the story of 911 when the air traffic had to find a place to land and ending up in Newfoundland.  Show details at https://comefromaway.com 
40 Years old, 3 children and love strikes again. "I hadn't heard his voice in 25 years, but I recognized it. And this is the man I married the following year." -June Campbell
Her second husband of 30 years, Gordon, was the youngest of 10 children. "Yes, we had 10, but they stopped when they attained perfection."
A Travel Conversation including: Australia, Barbados, Russia, Estonia, UK and more
"I married him for his Air Canada pass, and he married me for my underground parking." -June Campbell
Book: In a Sunburned Country, Bill Bryson Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/24.In_a_Sunburned_Country 
"It's all about making the new connections where you are." - Erin Davis
A great idea to share who you are by posting a photo outside your door in the retirement and long-term care home of when you were younger.  We would love to see a photo of you when you were younger.
"So important to remind people that we are the same spirits, the same soul, the same people.  It's just that our suits have gotten a little wrinkled over the years." - Erin Davis
"You can't beat a nice cod steak.  It makes good fish & chips." - Doug Robinson
If you could travel somewhere tomorrow (no limits), where would you go?
Book: Mourning Has Broken by Erin Davis - https://www.harpercollins.ca/9781443454636/mourning-has-broken/
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Joyce Stankiewicz on caring for a loved one with dementia and the buddy system at University Gates

Episode #39 - Formerly of New Hamburg now living at The Village at University Gates in Waterloo.  Doug & Erin welcome to the green bench, Joyce Stankiewicz, as they chat about the buddy system, caring for a loved one with dementia, and the importance of forgiveness, humour, and memories.
Sharing marriage stories from 70 years with her husband Bill and the tough conversation when required to take away someone's car keys.  A journey through dementia as Joyce cares for her husband through this process.
What is aphasia? 
Aphasia is a language disorder caused by damage in a specific area of the brain that controls language expression and comprehension. Aphasia leaves a person unable to communicate effectively with others.
Bill was diagnised with Nonfluent Variant Primary Progressive Aphasia. People with nonfluent variant primary progressive aphasia (nfvPPA) tend to come to the doctor’s office with complaints about pronouncing words or increasing trouble getting words out. Their speech may sound slurred, or their voice may change. As time goes on, people with nfvPPA have more trouble putting sentences together, and they eventually begin to speak slower and slower.
Doug's wife also lives with dementia sharing his experience as he noticed changes at home.
"If you have a problem and cannot find out how to solve, then get someone to help you solve it." -Joyce Stankiewicz
"The buddy system: to connect a person who lives at University Gates and knows the routine with someone who just moved into the Village." -Joyce Stankiewicz
Joyce has published two books about her mother. 1. My Journey, by Aida Sauder 2. Famous quotes and quips from Mother Sauder and others
Saying such as, "you get more flies with honey than vinegar", and more quotes shared by Joyce.
Advice for someone who cares for a loved one living with dementia.  "A comfort to be able to talk about it and to know that other share your pain." -Joyce Stankiewicz
"Joy shared is multiplied and pain shared is divided." -unattributed
 
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Recipes, memories, pasta and the past with Anna Piccoli & daughter Franca

Episode #38 - Erin Davis & Doug Robinson sit on the virtual green bench with Anna Piccoli and daughter Franca Smith to continue the conversation on our theme of connection, family, and service.
Anna lives with her husband of 62 years, Aldo, and her sister Josephine at The Village of Glendale Crossing in London, Ontario.
"I love everybody, especially my children and my grandchildren ...  and nobody smokes." -Anna Piccoli
Anna left Italy to live with her sister Josephine in Canada.  While writing back and forth with Aldo for a year, she convinced him to come over to Canada and got married.
Why Canada?  Tony and Josephine moved to London, Ontario as there were lots of job opportunities.  As more family arrived in Canada, the whole family stayed close in the same neighbourhood.
“Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city” - George Burns
What is your favourite Italian dish to cook/eat?
Anna's answer - Lasagna.
She continues to cook at The Village of Glendale Crossing with the recreation team.
Il pane apre tutte le boccheBread opens all mouths. If you want to get to know someone, invite them to eat with you. Good food can bring good conversation.
Everyone gives Anna yarn so that she can crochet items for them.
Franca shares about the Art Show: Home and Away, asking local artists to share their art about where they came from and what brought them to Canada asking the question which felt like home and which felt like away.
Interested in getting a book?  Reach out to elderwisdom@Schlegelvillages.com and we will connect you with Franca.
"Family comes first. Everything revolves around family, and food."  -Franca Smith
"When you learn about where your family came from and what they have been through to get us to where we are.  It is quite amazing." -Franca Smith
Anna shares scary memories from being 14 years old and living through the war. Her uncle understanding the German language supported them to be able to get away as they jumped home to home to survive.
Grazie
 
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100 Years of Wisdom with Aunt Reta

Episode #37 - Reta Baechler is the first centenarian guest to join Erin Davis and Doug Robinson on the green bench-as she shares her many years of wisdom and wit with us.  Aunt Reta as we know her is the Aunt to Ron Schlegel who you heard from in episode 7.
A Prestigious Club:The number of centenarians in Canada rose to 12, 822 as of July 1st, 2021.
Aunt Reta is the sister to Wilfred Schlegel who is the father of Ron Schlegel.  Five siblings with 3 older brothers and one younger brother and one younger sister, grew up on the farm outside Tavistock, Ontario.  
"Every Saturday morning we had to trim the wicks to make sure they would burn evenly." - Reta Baechler
A large German presence in Southwestern Ontario - Aunt Reta talks about growing together as a community, speaking Pennsylvanian German and learning English.  Growing to know each other.
"I felt so good being at home and having my neighbours around me so there was never a barrier.  We were all like one people." - Reta Baechler
Reta shares stories of her family connections with her father Wilfred and with her Grandmother.
Jump rope: Aunt Reta loved skipping when she was young. Her brothers made her jump ropes, and she fondly remembers receiving her very first store bought skipping rope. It had wooden handles, and she would skip her way to the barn to do chores, and then all the way home again. 
What was the invention that made your life easier?  Reta shares about the light switch being a fantastic invention with electricity.  "I remember when we turned on the light tap for the first time. This is so incredible, all we have to do it push a button and the light will come on." - Reta Baechler
A tradition of always having an extra plate set at the dinner table for a guest to join.  Reta remembers a plaque over the table that read “Christ is the head of this home, the unseen guest at every meal, the silent listener to every conversation.” Very important to her, and can picture it to this day. She says it is so important to have faith. 
“Well, I woke up again in the same bed I went to sleep in last night. There must still be a plan and a purpose for me today.”  - Reta Baechler
“Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift- that’s why we call it the present.” – Alice Morse Earle
 
BAECHLER, Reta Barbara, 100, of Stratford passed away peacefully with family by her side at Rotary Hospice Stratford Perth on Thursday, 27, 2022. 
 
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Meaningful relationships and growth in spirituality with Jack Paleczny

Episode #36 - A conversation that is raw in its emotions, very honest and open with Jack Paleczny of The Village at University Gates in Waterloo. A beautiful example of the connection among us all as he shares his story from the Green Bench.
Jack lives at The Village with and cares for his wife Diana Lynn who lives with both dementia and Parkinson's disease. He lives a life of service first as a leader to his community, serving God, serving the people around him, and today, serving up a whole lot of wisdom and perspective.
The 12s in Jack's life:12 Years of Education12 Years of Graduate Studies12 Years as a Priest12 Years as a Hospital Chaplain12 Years as a Pastor of the United Church
His sister is a nun who just returned back from 12 years in Africa.
Learn about the decision Jack made to leave the priesthood and how his mother stood up for him among his 8 siblings.
"The big part of chaplaincy training is that although you are grounded in your own faith, you are able to walk with others in their faith." -Jack Paleczny
"Chaplaincy is a beautiful experience." -Jack Paleczny
"Our higher power is GOOD." - Erin Davis
"The meaning/value of life is the very goodness of people and the desire of people to do good." -Jack Paleczny
When Jack first got to The Village at University Gates, everybody he met he would ask them their name.  "It was important to greet people by name and to hear their stories at The Village at University Gates."
Jack shares his tips to being an effective listener.
"If you can stay with the person and ask a question that unfolds their story a little bit more. They feel a connection, a bond, and trust in sharing their story." -Jack Paleczny
How do you remember people's names?
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